Probably, by the 3.30pm, last Friday, everyone in Year 12 had been asked about their start to Sixth Form.
"What difference is there between Year 11 and Year 12?" - You will have produced automatic answers by about the third time; "I like not wearing uniform but I don't like stressing over clothes and I like the freedom but I miss my old friends and I like the new subjects but everything is harder and this but that and this but that..." Stop.
So here are some honest thoughts about Year 12.
Firstly, lessons have gotten about fifty times more interesting than last year. Suddenly, we are being pushed and challenged, and are engaged in subjects of our own choosing and interest. Teachers are far less patronising and take a genuine interest in your opinion, as you do in theirs. Everyone turns up to a lesson to work and learn something; this is in stark contrast to G.C.S.E. where, given half the chance, you would do nothing.
For this reason, the biggest lesson I've learned is thus: if you see someone in your class whom you have preconceptions about - forget them. That was in secondary school; we've moved on.
--
WORD COUNT: 199
Monday, September 19, 2011
Monday, September 12, 2011
chain-smoking orang-utan moved from zoo
Prepare yourself because, by the end of the next paragraph, you may well feel it necessary to re-read the paragraph.
A chain-smoking orang-utan has been rescued from a life of downbeat decadence at a zoo in Johor, Malaysia. The orang-utan had started to chain-smoke and ingest beer, fizzy drinks and fast food.
“Smoking is not normal behaviour for orang-utans,” said Ahmad Azhar Mohammed, head of a zoo in the city of Malacca and winner of Mr. No-S**t-Sherlock 2011.
The orang-utan apparently suffered from serious mood swings and withdrawal symptoms, if not supplied with cigarettes. She also looked drowsy, sometimes - as if drugged - because she had begun to use the cigarettes, beer, fast food and other waste that punters had thrown into her enclosure.
Shirley, as she is known, will now go to the zoo in Malacca, where the phenomenally well-informed worker whose quote we used works, to be weened off cigarettes and her smoking habit before being sent to an endangered-species compound in the Malaysian part of Borneo.
TWOL says: If you are an orang-utan, avoid Malaysia.
--
WORD COUNT: 179
A chain-smoking orang-utan has been rescued from a life of downbeat decadence at a zoo in Johor, Malaysia. The orang-utan had started to chain-smoke and ingest beer, fizzy drinks and fast food.
“Smoking is not normal behaviour for orang-utans,” said Ahmad Azhar Mohammed, head of a zoo in the city of Malacca and winner of Mr. No-S**t-Sherlock 2011.
The orang-utan apparently suffered from serious mood swings and withdrawal symptoms, if not supplied with cigarettes. She also looked drowsy, sometimes - as if drugged - because she had begun to use the cigarettes, beer, fast food and other waste that punters had thrown into her enclosure.
Shirley, as she is known, will now go to the zoo in Malacca, where the phenomenally well-informed worker whose quote we used works, to be weened off cigarettes and her smoking habit before being sent to an endangered-species compound in the Malaysian part of Borneo.
TWOL says: If you are an orang-utan, avoid Malaysia.
--
WORD COUNT: 179
Sunday, September 11, 2011
thoughts on 9/11
TWOL faces something of a dilemma today.
The date is Sunday, September the 11th, 2011. Because of events in New York, Washington and Shanksville, PN, ten years to the day, there is only one topic to be discussed in today's entry. However, there has been masses of prose, across the internet and printed media, written about these events, and today's anniversary, so TWOL must write something unique.
Although TWOL was just six year's old at the time, TWOL still holds vague memories of the day. Genuine breaking news programmes, reserved for such events as the 9/11 bombing attempts, are extremely rare and TWOL was most disappointed, that day, that CBBC had been cancelled for the afternoon.
Of course, TWOL must extend its sympathies to those whom have lost a loved one or were killed. Fortunately, the only effect 9/11 has had on TWOL are the increasingly strenuous and lengthy airport security checks of the 21st century.
Finally, TWOL would like to put an immediate halt to insinuations that America somehow 'deserved' to be attacked as a result of their foreign policy. This horrific event has been the subject of much paranoia and speculation but this is ignorant, insulting and, in most cases, xenophobic.
--
WORD COUNT: 200
The date is Sunday, September the 11th, 2011. Because of events in New York, Washington and Shanksville, PN, ten years to the day, there is only one topic to be discussed in today's entry. However, there has been masses of prose, across the internet and printed media, written about these events, and today's anniversary, so TWOL must write something unique.
Although TWOL was just six year's old at the time, TWOL still holds vague memories of the day. Genuine breaking news programmes, reserved for such events as the 9/11 bombing attempts, are extremely rare and TWOL was most disappointed, that day, that CBBC had been cancelled for the afternoon.
Of course, TWOL must extend its sympathies to those whom have lost a loved one or were killed. Fortunately, the only effect 9/11 has had on TWOL are the increasingly strenuous and lengthy airport security checks of the 21st century.
Finally, TWOL would like to put an immediate halt to insinuations that America somehow 'deserved' to be attacked as a result of their foreign policy. This horrific event has been the subject of much paranoia and speculation but this is ignorant, insulting and, in most cases, xenophobic.
--
WORD COUNT: 200
Saturday, September 10, 2011
more continental madness
Britain may prosper by loosening its ties with Brussels, says William Hague, the Foreign Secretary. He says being bound to other countries by closer tax and spending rules was "always a giant mistake."
He blames the Liberal Democrats for hemming in the Conservatives with regards to repatriating power from Brussels and says, "That’s the area we had to compromise on in return for other compromises.”
TWOL feels inclined to agree. Repatriating power from Brussels is extremely necessary.
That free trade between the UK and Europe should ensue is clearly a good thing. Not only does the UK gain most of its income from Europe but good trade maintains good relations.
That Britain is doing things such as giving up its legal sovereignty (as it did yesterday) in return for a European extradition treaty is simply absurd. This treaty will give European courts the chance to demand the arrest and handover of British citizens for 'crimes' that Britain doesn't even fully recognise as crimes, such as 'corruption' and 'xenophobia'. They may be summoned even as mere 'suspects', which contradicts the historic principle that everyone is innocent until proven guilty.
For reasons like that, we need to tone down EU control.
--
WORD COUNT: 200
He blames the Liberal Democrats for hemming in the Conservatives with regards to repatriating power from Brussels and says, "That’s the area we had to compromise on in return for other compromises.”
TWOL feels inclined to agree. Repatriating power from Brussels is extremely necessary.
That free trade between the UK and Europe should ensue is clearly a good thing. Not only does the UK gain most of its income from Europe but good trade maintains good relations.
That Britain is doing things such as giving up its legal sovereignty (as it did yesterday) in return for a European extradition treaty is simply absurd. This treaty will give European courts the chance to demand the arrest and handover of British citizens for 'crimes' that Britain doesn't even fully recognise as crimes, such as 'corruption' and 'xenophobia'. They may be summoned even as mere 'suspects', which contradicts the historic principle that everyone is innocent until proven guilty.
For reasons like that, we need to tone down EU control.
--
WORD COUNT: 200
Thursday, September 8, 2011
tw-istaken identity
On Tuesday night, P.J. Harvey won the Mercury Prize and her fans were quick to shower @PJHarvey with praise on micro-blogging site, Twitter. Unfortunately, the music artist, P.J. Harvey, has the twitter name '@PJHarveyUK'. So who received over 2000 messages in two hours that night?
The unfortunate bearer of all the well wishes was Philip John Harvey, a software developer from Newcastle-upon-Tyne. His first tweet after the onslaught spelled out the situation perfectly: "well, this is awkward."
This isn't the first time Harvey has had a load of messages come through. When P.J. Harvey - the musician, that is - appeared on Late Night with Jools Holland, earlier in the year, the software developer received a reasonable number of messages too.
This happens to many other people too. Joe Hart, an 18 year-old computer science student receives a lot of messages when his namesake plays for Manchester City and England. The student says he once finished an essay: "I checked my Twitter and saw a tonne of ‘Well done, Joe Hart!’ tweets, and for a second I thought, ‘How did they know I finished the essay?’
This has also happened with @BP, @theashes, @SarahPalin and @DavidCameron!
--
WORD COUNT: 198
The unfortunate bearer of all the well wishes was Philip John Harvey, a software developer from Newcastle-upon-Tyne. His first tweet after the onslaught spelled out the situation perfectly: "well, this is awkward."
This isn't the first time Harvey has had a load of messages come through. When P.J. Harvey - the musician, that is - appeared on Late Night with Jools Holland, earlier in the year, the software developer received a reasonable number of messages too.
This happens to many other people too. Joe Hart, an 18 year-old computer science student receives a lot of messages when his namesake plays for Manchester City and England. The student says he once finished an essay: "I checked my Twitter and saw a tonne of ‘Well done, Joe Hart!’ tweets, and for a second I thought, ‘How did they know I finished the essay?’
This has also happened with @BP, @theashes, @SarahPalin and @DavidCameron!
--
WORD COUNT: 198
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
socialism, twinned with dictators and slobs
Benito Mussolini. Josef Stalin. Muammar Gaddafi. Pol Pot. Adolf Hitler. You knew that all five of these men were dictators. But did you know another thing about these five dictators? All five loathed capitalism and started their political journeys in socialism.
Before you dismiss this entry as a sensationalist attack on socialism because I have named five disillusioned dictators, consider what makes a dictatorship; totalitarian or authoritarian. No pluralism or democracy. No capitalism or competition in markets. Pure governmental control.
What relevance does this have? A fair bit, TWOL would suggest. Socialism in Britain has created a social under-class. These people are disillusioned, politically inarticulate and very open to suggestion. Because of the strength of capitalism and democracy in the UK, there is virtually no chance that Britain could become a dictatorship in the near future. However, flirting with socialism is flirting with serious potential consequences.
With the recession, people want a scapegoat. People want to blame their hardship on other people. Socialism only encourages this. The short-sighted view that capitalism has failed this underclass is ridiculous. With a little help from the level of socialism of New Labour, these lazy people have failed themselves.
--
WORD COUNT: 195
Before you dismiss this entry as a sensationalist attack on socialism because I have named five disillusioned dictators, consider what makes a dictatorship; totalitarian or authoritarian. No pluralism or democracy. No capitalism or competition in markets. Pure governmental control.
What relevance does this have? A fair bit, TWOL would suggest. Socialism in Britain has created a social under-class. These people are disillusioned, politically inarticulate and very open to suggestion. Because of the strength of capitalism and democracy in the UK, there is virtually no chance that Britain could become a dictatorship in the near future. However, flirting with socialism is flirting with serious potential consequences.
With the recession, people want a scapegoat. People want to blame their hardship on other people. Socialism only encourages this. The short-sighted view that capitalism has failed this underclass is ridiculous. With a little help from the level of socialism of New Labour, these lazy people have failed themselves.
--
WORD COUNT: 195
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
america coolest nation in world, apparently
A poll, by social networking site Badoo.com, has established American as being the "coolest nationality" in the world. The site asked 30,000 people across 15 countries which nationality they thought was the coolest and American got the most votes, with Spanish being the coolest Europeans, Brazilian being the coolest Latin-Americans and Belgian being the least cool nationality.
American was followed by Brazilian, Spanish, Italian, French, British (sixth!), Dutch, Mexican, Argentinian and then Russian, respectively. Belgian, Polish, Turkish, Canadian and German were the five least cool nationalities.
TWOL would just like to confirm its illegitimacy in terms of being able to judge coolness. TWOL enjoys reading classic literature, quoting Latin and Shakespeare, and the odd game of dice cricket. TWOL also enjoys politics, debates and being as opinionated as is reasonably possible.
So, now follows some unparalleled xenophobia/ignorance.
TWOL must admit some surprise when looking at that list. TWOL thought Germans were cool. They're efficient, hard-working and famous for beer, sausages and well-endowed ladies. TWOL also thought Argentina and France were un-cool. Argentina is famous for a fat man who plays football with his hands and France is famous for surrendering.
There's no future at the U.N. for TWOL, unfortunately.
--
WORD COUNT: 200
Monday, September 5, 2011
COMMENT: back to school
Draining. Boring. Numerous. Time-consuming. Pointless.
Those are five words that, at various times in the past two years, TWOL has used to describe GCSEs and school, in general. TWOL took about 12/13 subjects at GCSE level; all of which requiring revision and a bit - however small - of genuine effort.
As everyone heads back to school, TWOL would like to take a moment to reflect on all of its "back-to-school" moments in the last 11 years. From Year 1 to Year 11, going back to school has been outwardly dreaded and inwardly enjoyed. If you'll allow TWOL an elderly moment, secondary school truly is one of the best periods of your life. You hate it constantly whilst your there and then, in a Stockholm Syndrome-esque about-turn, you really miss all of the friendships and routines you've indulged in.
This year, especially in GCSE-land, you actually might find yourself a passion or strike up a friendship with a teacher. The majority of teachers are young, easy-going and just as up for taking the p*ss as you are.
And, when you get to the stage, as TWOL is, of starting sixth form next week, you'll realise there genuinely is nothing like secondary school.
--
WORD COUNT: 199
Those are five words that, at various times in the past two years, TWOL has used to describe GCSEs and school, in general. TWOL took about 12/13 subjects at GCSE level; all of which requiring revision and a bit - however small - of genuine effort.
As everyone heads back to school, TWOL would like to take a moment to reflect on all of its "back-to-school" moments in the last 11 years. From Year 1 to Year 11, going back to school has been outwardly dreaded and inwardly enjoyed. If you'll allow TWOL an elderly moment, secondary school truly is one of the best periods of your life. You hate it constantly whilst your there and then, in a Stockholm Syndrome-esque about-turn, you really miss all of the friendships and routines you've indulged in.
This year, especially in GCSE-land, you actually might find yourself a passion or strike up a friendship with a teacher. The majority of teachers are young, easy-going and just as up for taking the p*ss as you are.
And, when you get to the stage, as TWOL is, of starting sixth form next week, you'll realise there genuinely is nothing like secondary school.
--
WORD COUNT: 199
Sunday, September 4, 2011
McDonald's keeps calory count
From this week, McDonald's will start displaying clearer information about the calories in its products. The fast-food giant will display the calorie count on each of its products and will even mention that women need 2000 calories; men 2500. Greggs, Subway, Starbucks and Burger King are expected to follow in the next year, with Harvester and Wimpy already displaying such information.
This is all part of a deal between the government and the food industry to tackle obesity. These will help consumers to make "an informed choice" about their meals. Calorific information is already shown, clearly, on supermarket items and this is the next step in the government's war on obesity.
TWOL thinks that the last place you'd want to consider what you're eating is in a fast-food restaurant. Information on supermarket foods is necessary because probably 90% of what TWOL eats comes from a supermarket but, when TWOL goes to McDonald's, TWOL doesn't care what's in the food. It's a treat and it's pretty damn tasty.
Of course, it could be argued that fast food has no place in a healthy diet but self-discipline, like that, is quite a rare sight. And, of all things, McDonald's and self-discipline don't mix.
--
WORD COUNT: 198
This is all part of a deal between the government and the food industry to tackle obesity. These will help consumers to make "an informed choice" about their meals. Calorific information is already shown, clearly, on supermarket items and this is the next step in the government's war on obesity.
TWOL thinks that the last place you'd want to consider what you're eating is in a fast-food restaurant. Information on supermarket foods is necessary because probably 90% of what TWOL eats comes from a supermarket but, when TWOL goes to McDonald's, TWOL doesn't care what's in the food. It's a treat and it's pretty damn tasty.
Of course, it could be argued that fast food has no place in a healthy diet but self-discipline, like that, is quite a rare sight. And, of all things, McDonald's and self-discipline don't mix.
--
WORD COUNT: 198
Saturday, September 3, 2011
EDL problem will sort itself
The English Defence League clashed, today, with riot police, following a 'static' protest in London. Fire-crackers and bottles were thrown at the police by the right-wing nuts as Stephen Lennon, their founder, bragged about having broken the conditions of his bail to a 1000-strong crowd.
Theresa May, the Home Secretary, had prohibited the EDL from marching through Tower Hamlets and four other London boroughs, earlier this week, following August's Riots. This was the first such ban, called by Scotland Yard, since the Brixton Riots, nearly 30 years ago.
Ironically, the far-right group's protest sparked a counter-protest by the anti-fascist group, Unite Against Fascism, which outnumbered the EDL's rally.
Now that the Riots have happened, we can expect a lot of attention heading towards the Far Right. The Riots have clearly fuelled the ignorance and bigotry of people and the English Defence League now gets a lot more publicity because people enjoy its message. TWOL believes the EDL are a problem - NOT the main problem though.
The main problems are liberal policing, ridiculous human rights laws and too much socialism; the result of which are the rioters. Once that is sorted, the EDL problem will take care of itself.
--
WORD COUNT: 198
Theresa May, the Home Secretary, had prohibited the EDL from marching through Tower Hamlets and four other London boroughs, earlier this week, following August's Riots. This was the first such ban, called by Scotland Yard, since the Brixton Riots, nearly 30 years ago.
Ironically, the far-right group's protest sparked a counter-protest by the anti-fascist group, Unite Against Fascism, which outnumbered the EDL's rally.
Now that the Riots have happened, we can expect a lot of attention heading towards the Far Right. The Riots have clearly fuelled the ignorance and bigotry of people and the English Defence League now gets a lot more publicity because people enjoy its message. TWOL believes the EDL are a problem - NOT the main problem though.
The main problems are liberal policing, ridiculous human rights laws and too much socialism; the result of which are the rioters. Once that is sorted, the EDL problem will take care of itself.
--
WORD COUNT: 198
Friday, September 2, 2011
dirty tax
Prostitutes in the German city of Bonn must carry a ticket, purchased from a meter-like machine, while working the streets or they will be prosecuted for tax avoidance after a scheme was launched at the start of the week.
While prostitution is legal in Germany, prostitutes must pay income tax - the level of which varies from state to state. However, this has been hard to enforce as these women of the night ply their trade on the streets in what is something of a cash-in-hand (or other places) job.
There are around 200 prostitutes working in Bonn and the council have special wooden parking garages in certain areas of the city where men can retire to with their investment.
The women will be charged 6€ (£5.31) a night to work.
It'll be interesting to see how well that works. Clearly, prostitution is regarded as a genuine occupation in Germany and TWOL supposes that this form of income tax goes at least some way to making up for the fact that Germany carries the European Union.
--
WORD COUNT: 173
While prostitution is legal in Germany, prostitutes must pay income tax - the level of which varies from state to state. However, this has been hard to enforce as these women of the night ply their trade on the streets in what is something of a cash-in-hand (or other places) job.
There are around 200 prostitutes working in Bonn and the council have special wooden parking garages in certain areas of the city where men can retire to with their investment.
The women will be charged 6€ (£5.31) a night to work.
It'll be interesting to see how well that works. Clearly, prostitution is regarded as a genuine occupation in Germany and TWOL supposes that this form of income tax goes at least some way to making up for the fact that Germany carries the European Union.
--
WORD COUNT: 173
Thursday, September 1, 2011
regain the classroom, regain the streets
Michael Gove, the Education Secretary, today announced that teachers are to be given greater encouragement to use physical force on pupils where necessary, in order to maintain authority and discipline in the classroom.
Gove said that lapses in discipline and school attendance have fuelled an "educational underclass" who populate gangs and fuel crime and social breakdown.
This is the first move to tackle the causes of August's looting by England's "social underclass".
TWOL thinks this is a brilliant idea. Obviously, violence is never the answer but teenagers must face reasonable levels of discipline. If you eat too much chocolate, you feel sick. Similarly, if a teenager has too much freedom, chaos ensues. The reason that teenagers don't get to vote is because their judgment is not yet fully developed. Ill-discipline causes inefficiency and it was one of the reasons for the riots.
Of course, there are many other causes of the looting. Socialism and the resultant inflated self-worth is one. TWOL is firmly against both. Much more needs doing - and the Tories won't do it all. It won't be fully done until Britain is out of the E.U. However, TWOL thinks that this is a good start.
--
WORD COUNT: 198
Gove said that lapses in discipline and school attendance have fuelled an "educational underclass" who populate gangs and fuel crime and social breakdown.
This is the first move to tackle the causes of August's looting by England's "social underclass".
TWOL thinks this is a brilliant idea. Obviously, violence is never the answer but teenagers must face reasonable levels of discipline. If you eat too much chocolate, you feel sick. Similarly, if a teenager has too much freedom, chaos ensues. The reason that teenagers don't get to vote is because their judgment is not yet fully developed. Ill-discipline causes inefficiency and it was one of the reasons for the riots.
Of course, there are many other causes of the looting. Socialism and the resultant inflated self-worth is one. TWOL is firmly against both. Much more needs doing - and the Tories won't do it all. It won't be fully done until Britain is out of the E.U. However, TWOL thinks that this is a good start.
--
WORD COUNT: 198
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